"That messy love stuff"

OK so those of you who read regularly know that my love life is pretty much nonexistent. And most of the time, I'm OK with that.
But part of me often asks, is it because of me or because of things I cannot control?
To wit:
I would like to date someone for whom I do not have to explain My Entire Medical History during like the third date. It would be very nice to date someone who's known me awhile and therefore is aware of all the Medical Nuttiness that Is Me.
However--
This creates the problem of (maybe understandably?) creating fear of attachment. (Which was the downfall of my last relationship. Sigh) Now I guess on some level I can get that. But then the rest of me doesn't. I can't help my situation anymore than I can change my skin color. It's part of me. And if you're in love, should it matter? No, I'm not saying let's be all Moulin Rouge! here and not be practical. There are, of course, real-life considerations (kids, etc.) that need to be discussed. But should fear dictate a relationship? To be totally blunt, we're all going to die at some point. None of us are immortal (at least, that I know of). Everybody gets something. It's the way life is. And if you love someone, then shouldn't you want to be with them no matter how much time they may or may not have? Or what's "wrong" with them?
Maybe I'm being too idealistic. But there are times when I really wish I was in a relationship, and I wonder how much of the fact that I'm not is due to Situations Beyond My Control. Or if it's just me (as in personality or whatever).
It also seems like guys w/CF, or lung transplants, have better luck getting married. I've seen a lot (well, OK, a fair amount) of married guys in the CF clinic. Not so much for the women.
Sigh.

I love drugs...

OK not so much.
Today the cashier in the cafeteria asked me if I was pregnant. Since I've LOST weight during this most recent IV bout, I was a little bit appalled.
Sigh.

GRRR--From the Corner

We've discussed this here before, but this is just RIDICULOUS...

A manny is the cute new term for a male nanny. Mannies are newly popular among the well-staffed set in New York, Greenwich, Ct and similar locales. The idea is that your kids— sons especially — get a little more sports and rough-housing with the babysitting and less of the mollycoddling and all female environments too common in homes where dad works till all hours.

I was wondering if we should call the government of Michael Bloomberg, here in NYC, a "manny state" instead of the clichéd "nanny state." But, considering his latest initiative, the answer must be no. In fact, we are regressing to the "baby nurse" state. Having banned smoking and transfats from restaurants, the mayor is now focused on the eating habits of those too young to patronize the city's eateries. Specifically, as of yesterday, the mayor has begun a major push to get new mothers to breast feed their infants. Apparently only a quarter of NYC moms choose to do so at the moment, and he wants to triple that number in a few years. He is starting by having city-owned hospitals deny new mothers formula.

Let's stipulate that breastfeeding is healthier, more nutritious and cheaper than formula feeding; it may even have a marginal positive effect on IQ. (Nursing does require time and knowledge not universally available to execute properly— which is why it is largely the preference of better-educated women.) Just as forgoing transfats and smoking are objectively healthier choices — and yet is not the state's responsibility to make.

Still, this is a new, shocking level of intrusiveness into what should be an entirely personal decision. In fact, this is far more egregious than either of the previous policies — which apply to what are already regulated commercial establishments. How to feed one's own infant is about as intimate and personal a decision as families make.

So why is he doing it? Is it meant to compensate for his failure to pass his traffic congestion-pricing plan? Or his failure to make significant improvements in educating the city's public school children? Is this meant to give him a competitive advantage in his hinted-at presidential campaign? Is the never before heard of "breastfeeding issue" an instance where both the GOP and the Democratic party have failed to address a critical social problem, and the unique Bloomberg approach is required? Is it a midsummer joke? A parody of a conservative take on ultra-liberal, statist politics? Is he trying to out-feminine Hillary and John Edwards? Is it to take attention away from the New York Times revelation that his vaunted subway rides to work begin with a chauffeured SUV trip to an express stop?

What about those of us that CANNOT breastfeed? Huh? What are we supposed to do, Mayor Bloomberg? I guess the answer is move out of NYC--pronto.

breast feeding and transplant

OK, no, I am not pregnant. But this is something that's been bothering me lately, ever since the Delta debacle with the breast-feeding mom. ALl these women are out talking about how breast-feeding is the best, the most noble, the most natural way to do it, and if you don't breast feed then it's like you're denying your child these vital things.

OK I was not breast-fed. My brother and sister weren't, either, and you know, we all turned out OK. Breast-feeding never really had an appeal to me, and when I had CF, we couldn't breast-feed because we needed all the calories we could get. Breast-feeding would physically hurt us.

Pregnancy post-transplant is a risky thing, anyway. I'm sure that's something we'll end up discussing more here, but even if you get pregnant and have the baby, you cannot breast-feed. The immunosuppresant drugs are present in the breast milk, and after 9 months of walking the very, very fine line between suppressing and trying not to hurt the baby, doctors want to get you back to a normal med schedule as soon as possible. So breast-feeding is, again, out of the question, in order to preserve your own health.

I just wish people would udnerstand all that. When some of us use formula, it's not for some vain reason. Some of us have legitimate reasons for not breast-feeding. So get off our backs and stop telling us that "breast is best" and if we're using formula we're akin to child abusers or whatever. Some of us have no choice. It's a fine line.

OK, off my soapbox now. :) But it really does make me mad. Think people!!